In my experience, being indecisive is not about putting off choosing because you just don’t feel like doing it.
It’s not about being lazy or unmotivated.
It’s not about being selfish or inconsiderate.
At the deepest level, I think it comes down to trust.
Trusting yourself, and trusting that even if that decision doesn't bring about the result or reaction you were hoping for, it's ok, and might just be because something better is on the horizon.
To move things forward in life you have to make decisions, and determine what is most important to you.
You may have to take a risk and dip your toe into uncertainty when an outcome could go either way. You may feel vulnerable and exposed when you put an idea out there that you think other people might think is stupid.
But the alternative—staying small and quiet and never making a decision about anything with conviction—does not keep you safe. All it will do is keep you stuck.
Anxiety Is Just Excitement In Disguise
When I'm wrestling with the uncertainty surrounding a decision, I often think of something Gabby Bernstein said at one of her lectures, “Anxiety is just excitement in disguise.” I loved that because it made me think of the flip side of all the things I ruminate about when I feel paralyzed by fear and indecision.
What would happen if I changed the way I thought about the anxiety I associate with making decisions, moving things forward, trusting myself?
What if I could see that what I'm interpreting as anxiety might actually be a glimmer of excitement about the possibilities making the decision could lead to?
What if I could shift my perception from one of fear and worst-case scenarios to trusting that everything would unfold as it was meant to?
What if every seemingly bad decision or mistake was actually there to help teach me a valuable lesson?
If you’ve never considered this way of looking at it before you might think I’m glossing over something that I know runs deep for many of us, but this type of questioning has been incredibly helpful to me.
Finding a way through indecisiveness in particular and fear in general is proving to be one of the most eye opening experiences of my life.
And while it does seem scary sometimes, if I really stop and think about what that feeling is deep down, it is excitement.
Not always knowing the answer or outcome is part of what makes life exciting, and interesting, and worth the risk.
So take a few minutes today and simply ask yourself, "What if?"